For five decades, since the beginning of the Feminist movement, awareness and interest in the Divine Feminine and the Goddess has expanded. Scores of books have explored her historic appearance and role, and her many forms and guises. The question is asked repeatedly, “How we can return her to her rightful place in our culture?”

But what of the Divine Masculine?

After 5,000 years of masculine domination, control, patriarchy and imperialism, the Masculine looks like a problem to be solved rather than a subject to study, or an energetic force to embody. The Western Abrahamic religions – Judaism, Christianity, and Islam – are rightfully considered the chief cause of destruction of cultures, oppression of women, and rape of all things feminine, including the earth.

In Jonathan Kirsch’s excellent book, “God Against the Gods: The History of the War Between Monotheism and Polytheism,” the core value of monotheism is identified as “exclusivism.” Beginning with Akhenaton in Egypt, and then by the Jews, monotheists believe that worship is to be offered to a single god – to the exclusion of all other gods and goddesses. Not only is their god the best god, but the one and only god. All other deities are false, and must be destroyed. This zealotry extends to excluding or killing anyone who does not share their One True God. History is filled with their victims. They believed that their God demanded the blood of the non-believer.
From the Jews, this idea was extended into Christianity (against Jesus’ teachings), and then into Islam.

Prior to this exclusivism, hundreds of gods and goddesses lived and were worshiped in cultures throughout the world. There is evidence that early Jews worshiped the goddess Asherah along with Yahweh, their male deity, until the Jewish goddess-worshipers were all killed. The Jewish mystical tradition still acknowledges Shekinah as the feminine principle of life, but this esoteric understanding is not widely known or preached.

In Anodea Judith’s award-winning book, “Waking the Global Heart,” she paints a visionary story of the changes that occurred as civilizations shifted from Goddess worship to Gods-and-Goddesses worship to exclusive (masculine) God worship. When gods were both male and female, there was more parity between men and women. Gods and Goddesses of all cultures shared the qualities of their human worshipers — including love, lust, rage, and jealousy. Men and women could see qualities of the Divine within themselves because both genders were represented among the Gods.

When the Goddess was systematically overthrown and killed off by powerful male hierarchies, the solo male God became the (unqualified) source of life, creation, and salvation. God and men became responsible for fertility, nature, and taking “care” of the world. Masculine cultures produced excellent weapons, machines, and hierarchical organizations, but half of all culture was lost. Whatever was feminine became repressed, threatened, destroyed, and buried in the rubble. As Ms. Judith noted, “A religion with only one God is half-way to atheism.”

To find the Divine Masculine, we must search beyond patriarchal religions. We must look elsewhere for our Divinity.

In their classic book, “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine,” authors Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette make a distinction between “Boy Psychology” and “Man Psychology.” They write, “Feminists have seen how male dominance in patriarchy has been oppressive and abusive of feminine characteristics, virtues, and women themselves. Some feminists conclude that masculinity in its roots is essentially abusive, and that connection with “eros” – love, relatedness, and gentleness – comes only from the feminine side of the human equation. In our view, patriarchy is not the expression of deep and rooted masculinity. Truly deep and rooted masculinity is not abusive. Patriarchy is the expression of the immature masculine. It is the expression of Boy Psychology, and in part, the shadow – or crazy – side of masculinity. It expresses the stunted masculine, fixated at immature levels.”

Moore and Gillette, both psychologists, utilize Jungian Archetypes to distinguish the best qualities and virtues of mature masculinity, comparing them to immature expressions. If our Divinity is a reflection of our Virtues, we must examine the virtuous expression of masculinity to understand the Divine Masculine.

They identify four mature masculine archetypes: the King in his fullness, the Warrior in his fullness, the Magician in his fullness, and the Lover in his fullness. The immature expression (Boy Psychology) of each is identified as an earlier attempt to come into fullness: The Divine Child grows into the King, The Hero grows into the Warrior, the Precocious Child becomes the Magician, and the Oedipal Child becomes the Lover.

As with any path of virtue, there are many ways to go wrong, to allow ego needs to take over and express the negative aspects of the archetype. For example, the King has two shadow aspects: the Tyrant and the Weakling Leader. The Warrior’s shadow aspects are the Sadist and the Masochist. The Magician’s shadow includes the Detached Manipulator and the Denying “Innocent” One. It is easy to see that historical patriarchy is an expression and function of these shadow aspects. Imperialism, oppression, destruction of cultures, monotheistic exclusivism, uncaring exploitation of the earth’s resources, and domination and control of others are all expressions of these negative aspects of masculine power.

What are the Divine aspects of these archetypal forces?

A divine King is a benevolent provider for his kingdom. He brings order and safety where there is chaos and harm, organizes culture to provide prosperity for all, and ensures a free flow of energy and communication to elevate everyone around him. He serves the people along with his Queen, who is equal in stature and partnership.

This benevolent leadership can be seen in many of our cultural heroes – Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, John F. Kennedy, the Dalai Lama, and even CEOs of companies such as Ray Anderson of Interface, a carpet company on a mission to save the Earth’s environment.

A divine Warrior is a protector, not an invader. He creates a safe environment in order for the people to thrive and grow. He defends his territory, which could include the whole earth, from destruction and exploitation. He is also an Inner Warrior, doing good battle with his own ego and psychology, fighting to strengthen his own divine nature against the inner forces of chaos and vice. Our eco-warriors at the front of battle, including tree-sitters and environmental lawyers, are doing this battle. Spiritual warriors like philosopher Ken Wilber use their own strength and fortitude to discover the truth that includes everyone and everything, leaving nothing out.

The Hero is, curiously, part of Boy Psychology. The Hero looks like a man, but is really a boy attempting to become a man. He journeys out to save a damsel in distress or fight a dragon to prove himself. His ego seeks acknowledgment and praise for being a hero. Military officers are most often heroic types, and consequently can rationalize destroying a village in order to save it, as Lieutenant Calley did in Viet Nam. Most film heroes are of this ilk. Rarely, we see an example of the mature masculine in films, such as Obi-Wan Kenobi in Star Wars, or Seven Samurai in Akira Kurosawa’s 1954 film.

A divine Magician uses his skill and knowledge to benefit all of humankind. Doctors, healers, scholars, inventors, musicians, and wisdom leaders are examples of the virtuous Magician. In it’s negative, egoic, or boyish manifestation, it may appear as a know-it-all, using knowledge to oppress, manipulate or brutalize others. Our divine Magicians are generous creators such as Deepak Chopra, who weaves others’ wisdom into popular culture, and Bono, the Irish musician in U2 whose social activism has brought international acclaim.

The divine Lover is a man of both heart and wisdom. In partnership with his consort and partner, he brings the fullness of love to all of life. The good husband and father who works hard to love and raise his family is an example of the Lover in his fullness. He may lead a non-profit organization that is working to heal the world. David Deida, a controversial teacher of Tantra, represents the divine Lover in his fullness, bringing the power of love to his work and life, and encouraging men and women to fully embody the divine forces.

It is important to separate the masculine and feminine from the male and female genders. The virtues of the divine masculine can appear and have full flower in any body, regardless of the shape and size of its genitals. In the same way as the divine feminine has been recognized as a force that can be owned and embodied by both men and women, the divine masculine is inside us all.

As human beings, we stand between the earth and the sky. We are a product of both mother (mater = matter/matrix) and father (pater = pattern), a masculine God and a feminine Goddess, Creator and Creatrix. We are part of their divinity, and we are thus divine by design. When we actively practice and pursue our virtues, we become naturally caring, generous, loving, protective, encouraging, curious and creative.

Some virtues appear to be more expressive of the feminine, others as expressive of the masculine, but all virtues are expressions of our divine nature. When we are in our fullness as human beings, we express the best of ourselves. Our communities and our cultures thrive.

Two virtues are especially required today: vigilance and fierceness. We must be eternally vigilant, protecting ourselves and our families from negative, immature qualities – whether feminine or masculine. We must bring our fierceness as well as our love and wisdom to educate and grow ourselves, our children, and each other. Our job is to create a whole, balanced, and good life for all. May you be blessed by both the Goddess and by God in healthy partnership on your journey forward.

(c) Copyright 2010 by Lion Goodman. All rights reserved.

I wrote this post on Facebook recently:

Judgment of another person puts them in a box and reduces them to a mere label. When we judge ourselves, we put ourselves in the same box. Compassion is what opens the box — the full-spectrum humanity of the other person (as well as our own) is revealed, shining like a jewel.

I was mentoring a brilliant young coach who complained about her own judgmental nature. She found that her judgment of others kept her separate from them. It created a safe distance, but made her feel lonely.  The problem was her habit of mind: She judged everyone, including herself.  “Judging others is bad,” she said, “and I’m bad for judging others.”  I pointed out that judgment is a sword with two sharp ends.  It always stabs in both directions.

One definition of “to judge” is “a formal utterance of an authoritative opinion.”  Another is “the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing.”

Discernment is the positive side of evaluation and forming opinions. It is the ability to detect whether something is good for you or not, helping you establish good boundaries with others and the world, and  keep yourself healthy and safe.  We could all use a little more discernment.

What turns discernment into judgment is the added belief (a value judgment) that the other person’s characteristic or behavior is not just different (or “not right for me”), but is wrong or bad.  There is a positive benefit to doing so: an elevation of self-status.  If he’s bad or she’s wrong, I’m now above them.  That feels good.  As social creatures, we want to know where we belong in the pecking order.  We want to elevate our status whenever possible.  Judging others works well.  If I put her down, I go up.

Once we label someone with our judgment, we no longer see them as a complete human being with the full range of personal characteristics: successes, failures, struggles, pain, joys, limitations, beauty, glory, etc.  Instead, we see through the label we’ve slapped onto them.  They are no longer a person — they are sub-human, a thing, an object of our derision.  In the extreme, this turns into verminization — seeing a group or class of people as pests which must be destroyed.

We lose our connection to the person or group we’ve judged, and immediately lose our connection to the part of ourselves that is like them.  Until we judge, we are part of everything, and everything is a part of us.  The ultimate result of judgment’s harsh and final separation is our own deep feeling of being disconnected — alone in the world.  Our loneliness then turns us into a sociopathic seeker after connection, which we might find in drugs, alcohol, unloving sex, bad relationships, food, over-work, or some other addiction.

Imagine removing the belief “There’s something bad (or wrong) about that person.”  Then imagine replacing it with the belief, “That person is different than I am, but just like me, they are a full-spectrum human.  They have had difficulties and hurts, and they are seeking ways to be happy.  Just like me, they are learning about life, the world, and themselves.”

This is the essence of compassion, which removes the “Other” from the box we’ve put them into, and gives them back their humanity.  We become more fully human in the process.

And if we are judge ourselves (and who among us does not?), we do the same thing – label ourselves, make ourselves wrong, aim the arrow of criticism inward.  Try this belief instead:  “Just like other full-spectrum humans, I’m a learning being.  I make mistakes, and that’s how I learn and grow.  I am a multidimensional doorway to Spirit, to God, to Source.  My soul is whole and unbroken, and my human nature is beautiful, including its imperfections.  I am a part of the Universe, I belong here, and I accept all aspects of myself.”

Here’s the test of whether a belief is empowering and positive:  Would you enjoy living in a world in which everyone believed that?

Beliefs are useful. They eliminate the discomfort of the unknown.

When we are uncertain, or in unfamiliar territory, we feel anxious. “I don’t know what’s going to happen next.”  The sensation is familiar — feel what it feels like to hold the belief, “Something out there might be dangerous. Something bad might happen.” It is a biological signal, heightening our awareness of the environment, preparing us for “fight, fight, or freeze.”

Beliefs are a way out, back to the comfort of the known.  “It’s okay, it’s just the wind.”  “Daddy’s here to protect you.”  “Look — there are no monsters underneath your bed.”

Our biological and anthropological history installed anxiety as a survival mechanism.  If we’re uncertain about what’s going to happen, and we’re driven to figure it out and prepare for it, we have a much better chance to survive the next snowstorm, famine, or attack.  “Figuring it out” is the construction of a belief.  “Planning in advance” is a learned behavior based on the belief in predictability.  We live in a mostly predictable universe.  Except when the shit hits the fan.  Then, anything goes.  No amount of planning in advance is helpful.  Sometimes a deep ocean drilling rig explodes and spews millions of gallons of oil and gas into the ocean waters.  Then, you do the best you can.  In an emergency, apply awareness first.

When we’re uncertain about our past, as in “Why did that happen to me?,” beliefs are useful as explanatory devices.  “I’m a bad boy. That’s why Daddy hits me.”  Something is settled.  The unknown is now known.  The belief may be fallacious, but it settles the anxiety deep in the body’s psyche.

Every belief we accumulated was useful at the time. It reduced some anxiety or uncertainty.  Do you remember the feeling of being called on in class and not knowing the answer?  It’s shame — especially if other kids laughed at us.  This feeling drives some children to come to the conclusion (belief), “That’s never going to happen again. I’m going to study so I know the answers.”  Other children take the downward path into the belief: “I’m just stupid.  I’ll never learn that stuff.  I give up.”

The unfortunate fact is that beliefs do not automatically expire when their usefulness is over.  Even as we grow into adults, the old beliefs run us, especially when similar incidents occur.  The boss asks you a question you don’t know the answer to. Your face flushes. The familiar, bitter taste of shame appears.  Suddenly, you feel (and act) like you’re seven years old.

The BeliefCloset Process is a tool for success. When you delete your collection of old, useless beliefs, one-by-one, out of your belief closet, you make room for new, useful and empowering beliefs.  You can live the life you were meant to live.  When you face the unknown from centered Presence, rather than your old patterns, your natural enthusiasm, curiosity, joy, and playfulness emerge.  You are no longer limited by your old patterns or limitations.  Your True Self shines in the world.  You’re giving your gifts that you were designed to give.  This is No-Limits Living, and it’s available to you.  Start by cleaning out your Belief Closet.

During a recent presentation to the L.A. Chapter of the International Coach Federation, a coach questioned whether transformation could be as quick and efficient as I claimed.  “I’ve tried other techniques,” she said, “but the only thing that’s worked is long-term therapy.”   Although I’m a fan of psychotherapy (having studied it since college), I had to take exception to her assumption.

“Because our beliefs create our reality, if you believe that transformation takes a lot of time, you will have the experience of transformation taking a lot of time.  If, on the other hand, you eliminated that belief, and replaced it with the belief, “Transformation takes no time,” you would experience something quite different.”

With many of my clients, the first belief we need to eliminate is “This won’t work for me.”  Once that one is out of the way, it becomes easy — almost effortless — to dis-create the remaining beliefs (and get instantaneous results).

Our beliefs are always verified by our experience.  We seek and find evidence to support every belief we have.  If we have conflicting beliefs (I’m a good person.  I’m a bad person.), we find convincing evidence for both.

The Scientific Method of Inquiry is an attempt to get around this self-verification principal and find out what is “really” going on.  It works to some extent because double-blind studies take most of the bias out of the research findings. But there is clear evidence that scientists usually verify their assumptions.   The so-called “placebo effect” works — and works well — because patients believe that the “medicine” they are receiving will help or heal them.  Instead of discounting the process as “just” the placebo effect, we should be investigating the powerful role of beliefs in healing.

Doubts are simply a special category of beliefs, a sort of bet on a negative future.  “I doubt whether I will win” is a preparation for the expectation (belief) that you will lose, and an attempt to avoid disappointment.  Get underneath the doubt, and you’ll find a negative belief there every time.

Alice claimed that she sometimes believed six impossible things before breakfast. By doing so, she had great adventures, far beyond the limitations and possibilities set out for her by other people’s beliefs.

In Tim Burton’s fantastic new film, Alice in Wonderland, Alice is portrayed as a ingénue who is caught between two worlds: the staid expectations and beliefs of her Victorian era social structure (as lived and endorsed by her family), and the world of the possible, as taught and demonstrated by her late father, a man with visions of grandeur and adventure in far-off lands.

Like Alice, we have the same tug-of-war inside of us. Our biology drives us in two directions at once: toward the secure, same, and known on the one hand, and toward the new, the novel, and the unknown on the other. We live inside this tension, and we make our lives work – or not – by dealing with these opposite urges within us.

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